QUIET QUITTING – THE ANSWER TO BURNOUT?

August 13, 2022

This trending topic is receiving a huge amount of attention which shows that it is really striking a chord. I want to explore it because it is just not in my psychology. I’m too black and white, either for something or against it. If I don’t like a work situation, I’ll leave. I’m probably more of a Great Resignation rather than a ‘lie-back’ person.

When I posted about quiet quitting on LinkedIn a few days ago, one of the people who responded wrote this:

“It’s heart-breaking to think anyone could feel the need to do this in any aspect of their life. ❤️‍🩹”
”Life is a gift 🎁 something so precious 🌟 that we only get to enjoy once & when it’s gone, there isn’t a re-run we can apply for 🙏🏼
”If “quiet-quitting” is as good as it gets for some people, what are they waiting for? ⏰ Who do they think will make the changes in their life & why don’t they see they deserve so much better?! 💪🏼
”I’ve heard of ‘controlling the controllables’ but if we don’t own our shit, then we leave the door open for anyone else to do that for us. And we all know people who will happily step into those shoes for us😠

“Rant over 😂 great post Hilary Rowland & a terrifying concept. I just hope anyone who is in this trap has the support around them to realise the stars are only a moment away 💫”

It got me thinking that, while quiet quitting, the art of doing no more than is required of you, may be the right response to burnout for some people in a few desperate situations, but to be emotionally and mentally healthy it should be intentional, thought through, a deliberate plan.

There are many people who are very burnt out and I recently spoke to someone who is intending to take time out of the workplace to recover. As the saying goes, ‘They who fight and run away live to fight another day.’ But that’s the point, it’s not giving up the fight whatever that represents. It’s regrouping, refreshing and recovering.

Perhaps those quiet quitters feel they’ve had too many demands made of them, been asked to do things that are not their fight and without support and recognition, and therefore why should they bother? I’m with them on that, but to really benefit from stepping back, it needs to be part of a larger plan for life, one where they own the direction.

There’s no doubt things are very difficult in many ways at the moment.

What do you really need? We can help you think it through. Our retreats offer the opportunity to step back, take some time out, decide what’s right for you. Act now.

Blog

Walking the talk

by Next Chapter Retreats

May 30, 2022

This week I’m back on the Scottish island of Iona. I came here last year for a retreat feeling very burnt out like many others. It restored my soul and a sense of perspective.

When I look back over the last year, I’m aware that we now have an even greater focus on wellbeing together with our partners Cesar Gamio and George Anderson. I’ve written a White Paper on the wellbeing needs of senior executives and we’ve designed some programmes for them which involve both retreats and coaching.

I’m a great believer in eating my own dog food and having my own retreat is so important to be able to do what we do. It is a privilege and an honour to work with people so dedicated to their personal growth and to see the transformation in them and their lives. The changes seem to encompass so many areas:

Family – rebuilding and investing in relationships with partners and children
Business – building self-belief, valuing himself and his contribution so that he can ask for the fees he deserves
Discovering new abilities – who knew she had artistic talents?
Finding a network of people that have your back and will encourage you to keep growing.

It’s made me think about how I’ve invested in my own wellbeing this year and what has made a difference as I’m not going to Iona burnt out. A bit tired but not burnt out.

Setting aside time for a weekly meditation
Putting routines in place, having set times for writing and generating content
Keeping my mornings, when I have most energy, for important things and work which requires greater concentration. I keep afternoons for calls and meetings when I need the interaction with others to reenergise me
Planning my week every Friday so that I hit the ground running on Monday, not faffing around trying to work out what I’m meant to be doing
And finally, not a difficult one for me, exercise – cycling, swimming, walking and Pilates.

Iona is a very spiritual place which is one of the things I love about it. Spirituality matters to me as it does to a lot of us, but we don’t seem to feel comfortable talking about it, perhaps because of the fear that it will spill over into religion which can be so contentious. For me, it’s about the connection with something much bigger than myself, as well as what makes my life meaningful and significant.

What works for you in managing your time, energy and contribution?

Blog

Your Wellbeing or Personal Indulgence?

by Next Chapter Retreats

April 24, 2022

This is a big topic at the moment. It attracts so much attention and creates so many headlines that it would almost seem to be a global obsession. It may have got to the point that people switch off when they hear the word even though the need has not disappeared. Tech companies seem able to sell any number of apps and gadgets to measure every aspect of physiological function, but for many people, does it go beyond measurement and the possible creation of even more anxiety caused by the results?

I know it’s important but that doesn’t mean I find it any easier to give it the right priority in my life. My toes curl slightly at the term ‘self-care’. If our wellbeing were a business, would we invest in it? If not, why not? Here’s the business case for the investment:

Protecting the company’s investment. Sports franchisees that pay top dollar for star athletes require them to exercise, eat better and take care of their overall wellness during the season. The same should be true for C-level employees as companies pay more for those roles, particularly the top job. Considering that the Economic Policy Institute estimates that average CEO pay is 271 times the nearly $58,000 annual average pay of the typical American worker, it could be said that the C-Suite should be held to a higher personal maintenance standard.
Supposing you depart suddenly as a result of ill health. Costs can mount quickly without an obvious internal replacement. The typical seven-figure severance package and six-figure retainer for an executive search firm are just the beginning. Board members might have to fly in on short notice for an emergency meeting. A small army of professionals — all of whom charge by the hour — begins to mobilise: communications consultants and employment lawyers, movers and relocation experts. The longer the clock ticks, the higher the figure on the meter. And those are just the hard, easily quantifiable impacts. They pale in comparison to the less visible costs. Turmoil and uncertainty at the top filter quickly down through the organisation, slamming the brakes on growth initiatives, hindering the closing of vital deals, and causing some valued employees to start looking for new positions elsewhere.
What is more difficult to quantify but a reality nonetheless is the cost of lack of efficiency, delayed decisions, and bad decisions as a result of ill-health, burnout or being generally sub-par.

What’s your level of investment in your wellbeing? Can you afford NOT to invest in wellbeing?

Blog

What’s your state of wellbeing?

by Next Chapter Retreats

April 14, 2022

With most of us having had a break over Easter, it’s a good time to switch off but also have some time to reflect on our state of wellbeing.

There is no shortage of evidence to demonstrate that people at a senior level have been more adversely affected by the changes and working conditions brought about by the COVID 19 pandemic. Much as we might all have desired a return to ‘normal’, it would appear that working patterns have undergone a permanent shift with many workers continuing to prefer to work from home – another adjustment to make.

These pressures may have affected you in a number of ways. You may be

Thinking of leaving the workplace altogether
Seeking a new position
Finding that you are part of the epidemic of stress and burnout.

If you’re in this position, you have probably recognised the need to support employees who have been similarly, but not as badly affected by these conditions and put in place wellness initiatives in your companies. But what about you and your wellbeing needs? Many senior people don’t recognise this as a need for themselves and would rather adopt either a stoical approach or deny that there’s a problem.

This carries huge risks as the effects of your ill health can be far-reaching. Senior executives have huge responsibilities, hence the stress, and the implications for being sub-par on business effectiveness, decision making, and leadership are also great: a strong business case for their investing in your health and wellbeing. It will also have a beneficial effect on the rest of the company, your leading by example.

Why don’t you think about investing some time in yourself and the rest of your life by coming on one of our retreats? Giving yourself time to think about your direction, purpose and state of wellbeing could pay dividends for you, the family and the business.

Our next 5-day retreat starts on the 13th – 16th of June. We are having drinks in London on 27^th April at 5pm at the Eight Club for people who’d like to find out more. For those who can’t make that date, we are having a Zoom call at 5pm on 3^rd May. Please get in touch if you’d like to participate in either of those events.

Blog

Is your senior management team in danger from “The Great Resignation”?

by Next Chapter Retreats

April 7, 2022

The ‘Great Resignation’ seems to be everywhere. I can’t open a newsletter in my inbox without reading about it. I’m not surprised. The effects of the pandemic are going to be with us for a long time and they are hard to identify and pin down. Generally, there is a sense of people being unsettled and the current war in Ukraine and economic pressures aren’t helping. While all the COVID regulations have been lifted, COVID is still very much with us, to an even greater extent if anything and it doesn’t seem as though there will ever be a point when we can wave goodbye to it.

In the management team retreats I’ve been leading I’ve found that many members of senior teams have been adversely affected. It’s happened slowly and unnoticeably to the point where burnout and languishing are ‘normal’ ways of being. Senior management teams have become quite dislocated and disconnected from each other, operating at a transactional level rather than in an effective engaged, committed way. Now, because of hybrid working and people retreating from offices again, there hasn’t really been the opportunity to recover and reset ways of working.

At a recent team retreat, I gave people the opportunity to say how they were really, rather than the conventional ‘fine’ – because retreats offer a combination of reflection and discussion both at a personal and at a business level. They valued being able to be honest which paved the way for further openness about issues that needed to be addressed for example how to increase productivity. Retreats are a great opportunity for the team to spot the gaps, see what’s not working and start to sort it out there and then, an opportunity to go below the surface and work out what the real issues are.

What has also emerged is the extent to which company cultures have been damaged. The opportunity to invest in a couple of days away to stand aside and reflect allows teams to identify aspects of the culture which have enabled them to perform at their best, that were there previously and may now have been lost. Many people are realising that cultures will need to be rebuilt. Retreats offer a rare and valuable opportunity for senior management teams to reconnect in order to do this.

What teams find difficult but also very valuable is being able to slow down and reflect. Our retreats offer time and space in an environment which promotes relaxation, being able to connect with others. We heavily discourage any looking at emails or business phone calls and while it’s hard to switch off initially, gradually people are grateful for being able to go off-grid for a few hours. One of our recent retreat participants put it: https://youtu.be/NBYTP9XWnVY

What’s the state of your senior management team? Drifting into a Great Resignation?

Blog

Ways to deal with anxiety

by Next Chapter Retreats

March 16, 2022

I’m wondering when we last faced such a conflation of causes of fear and anxiety. We’ve had two years of the pandemic and while the acute effects are past for the time being there are still many cases of COVID with people not being able to work because they are ill. Then for businesses, there is the effect of Brexit on the ease of doing business, higher taxes, changes to patterns of working and many employees are choosing a hybrid model which some managers find difficult. Affecting both business and individuals are higher and more volatile energy prices. We will all start to feel the effect of an increased cost of living. Some may have been affected by extreme weather events caused by climate change. And on top of all of that comes a war in Ukraine. The biggest factor in all of this is that a lot of it is beyond our control.

It is also very easy to focus on ourselves and how other people behave in very difficult circumstances can be enormously inspiring. We’ve all been moved by the many stories of ordinary people doing extraordinary things. Such stories enable me to find courage.

What else can we do to prevent ourselves from being overwhelmed by anxiety?

Being disciplined in our use of social media. The constant stream of news can be very addictive, and doom scrolling doesn’t help. There are plenty of people catastrophising which is only likely to increase our anxiety.
Check our sources of information especially at a time when there is plenty of misinformation on all kinds of topics.
Routines can also help. During lockdowns I’m sure I was not alone in finding that daily and weekly routines gave me a structure which helped me get through, for example, making sure I took breaks and went outside.
Keeping a sense of perspective. One of the things that can help with this is gratitude practice. Thinking of at least three things to be grateful for before going to sleep makes for a much better night and reminds us of all that is positive in our lives.
Mindfulness. How this works when it comes to anxiety is that we need to stop and observe ourselves and how we’re feeling to help us manage our feelings. Mindfulness creates a gap between feeling and responding and stops us from just reacting in a way which might not help.
Look for a way to get involved, especially in the Ukrainian situation. There is no shortage of charities who need money, clothes or food which they are transporting to Ukraine to support the people there.
Random acts of kindness can change our mindset and make a difference to others.
Exercise. There is plenty of evidence that shows that exercise is a very good way of dealing with anxiety.
Talk to someone. Stay connected, don’t get isolated, don’t withdraw. Keep in touch with your family and friends and if you need professional help don’t be afraid to admit that you need help. There is no shame in feeling anxious, especially now.

We’re here to talk if you’d like to get in touch.

Blog

What to think? What to feel?

by Next Chapter Retreats

March 1, 2022

We’re living in momentous times. I noticed that the invasion of Ukraine evoked feelings very similar to the announcement of the first lockdown or the results of the Brexit referendum. It feels like something fundamental has changed. My first reaction was that of shock, that something like war in Ukraine could actually happen and on our doorstep. I then felt very confused about what else I felt and whether there was something I should feel.

Scrolling through Twitter showed a variety of reactions from predictions of World War 3 breaking out and others pleading with them to dial down the temperature for the sake of their anxiety. I could identify with that. I was talking to a Ukrainian and felt so helpless when all I could offer is emotional support.

For me, it has highlighted the difficulty of accessing and acknowledging our feelings. Personally, on the one hand, it’s been a great week with a business opportunity that could make a huge difference to our business, but on the other hand, I have almost felt guilty about how happy that has made me feel with everything else going on.

Acknowledging and articulating our feelings is an important way of looking after ourselves simply because it makes us listen to ourselves and if we wait long enough, to hear our deepest anxieties and longings. The psychologist Susan David has some excellent advice about dealing with our feelings and I highly recommend her TED talk https://www.ted.com/talks/susan_david_the_gift_and_power_of_emotional_courage

She makes the point that being emotionally agile as opposed to emotionally rigid, as well as aware and accurate with our feelings enables us to take the right action, action which is supported by our values. For many of us, core values act as the anchor in our lives, and we need to remind ourselves what really matters to us.

I’ve been introduced to a mindfulness exercise that I find helpful in grounding myself and getting in touch with my feelings. It involves going outside, looking around and asking the following questions:

What do I see? (look for four things)

What do I hear? (listen for three things)

What do I feel? (Find two feelings)

What do I see? (look for three things)

What do I hear? (listen for two things)

What do I feel? (Find one feeling)

What are your feelings leading you to do?

Please get in touch if this has sparked something or you’d like to find out more about Next Chapter Retreats.

Blog

Time For A Retreat?… I Don’t Think So

by Next Chapter Retreats

June 23, 2021

We have just concluded the first 3 days of our flagship retreat programme for a cohort of senior executives. We wanted to share an article written by one of the group to give you a flavour of the life-changing benefits to be experienced.

“Someone said to me ‘you should go on a retreat’, ‘a retreat? have you seen my diary, I barely have time for lunch each day let alone 5 days out on a retreat’. ‘No way. I’m fine as I am thanks’.

(Getting up at 5am, working until 7pm and regularly working at the weekends too. Heart regularly beating beyond the pace it should, snapping at the children in the brief 30 minutes I saw them before bedtime and so exhausted missing dinner as I didn’t have time and going to bed at 9pm before a restless night’s sleep and groundhog day starting again).

No I’m fine thanks – I don’t have time for a retreat.

Meanwhile, friends raising their concern with me that I’m always working and ‘are you ok’ ‘you must remember to look after yourself’, the occasional gut-wrenching comments from the children that ‘you’re always working mummy’ ‘we never see you’ ‘please can you stop looking at your laptop and help me with my reading?’. Family members raising constant concern that ‘you can’t keep going at this rate’ you’ll burn yourself out’.

Time for a retreat…? No thanks, I’m fine. Honestly, I’m fine.

Clients sending me messages of concern, distant contacts from the past noting their concern on social posts, family pleading me to take some time out. Anxiety in my chest, shallow sharp breathing, never taking a deep full breath, sleep getting harder and harder due to a constant busy mind. Restless legs. Drinking a glass or two of wine every night knowing it’s a quick way to get to sleep (despite never staying asleep for long). Changing my diet to try to shift a few pounds but having no luck. Exercising more but feeling more depleted. Running harder and faster on the treadmill but getting nowhere. More meetings, more actions, more calls, ok let’s try getting up at 4am instead then and gaining another hour for work – I’m not sleeping so why not.

I’m no wife, I’m no mother, I’m no business owner, I’m no daughter, I’m no friend. I’m doing none of those things successfully. But then I was told as a young girl, struggling with studies and dyslexia, ‘you’ll never achieve academically so just accept that. Just accept you won’t get high grades you’re not clever enough’.

Time for a retreat…? No thanks, I’m fine.

I’m not fine. I’m far from fine but I don’t have time to take out for myself.

Is that what I want written on my gravestone? Is that what I want my legacy to be. Is that the view I want my children to have of a successful role model and mother?

……..

I met Hilary and Peter through a business group called BoB (Business of Brand) and I helped them shape the strategy and marketing activation for their Retreat business, a new venture they had taken after years of experience coaching and mentoring senior executives and dealing with their fair few personal turning points in life. They were inspiring, they talked about the power and intensity of self-discovery their retreats created and we shared stories from previous retreaters for the website and social.

……

I’ve just returned from the first 3 days of their flagship 5 day Executive Retreat (split into 3 days with a 10 week period of reflection before the final 2 days) and here is what I’ve learned.

I am worth it.
I can break the ground hog day and I will.
I can be successful without jeopardising my family and friends.
I am good at what I do. And people appreciate me and see strengths and skills I me I never knew I had.
I’ve got a strong purpose and I’m value driven, I just never realised those values and how I play them out in day to day life in decisions and relationships.
I’m not the little girl standing in her head teachers office being told to accept second best.
I’m not a failed mother.
I’m someone who is powerful and strong and I now know exactly what I need to do to get the balance I need in life. I need to let the fun back in. I need regular time out, for me, to make me the best version of myself I can be.
I’m three days in but world’s apart from the women that arrived on that sunny Sunday afternoon.

Set in the beautiful countryside in the Cotswold, surrounded by two ultimate professionals who know exactly what they are doing and the journey they are taking people on – I discovered I have passion, kindness and determination racing through my veins. I’m better equipped now to channel this and I’m on a journey with like-minded professionals.“

www.nextchapteretreats.guru

QUIET QUITTING – THE ANSWER TO BURNOUT?

Walking the talk

Your Wellbeing or Personal Indulgence?

What’s your state of wellbeing?

Is your senior management team in danger from “The Great Resignation”?

Ways to deal with anxiety

What to think? What to feel?

Time For A Retreat?… I Don’t Think So

Recent Posts

Recent Comments

Archives

Categories

Meta

business retreats

Recent Posts

Recent Comments

Archives

Categories

Meta